Saturday, February 24, 2007
WARNING: The post below is not suited for all reading audiences. It was written when I was pretty ticked off and the language within refelcts that anger. You have been warned.Overheard on flight from LA to Cincinnati (some pompous California bitch):
"Look how ugly it is. No wonder they call it the armpit of America. Yeah, that's what they call it. The armpit of America. I hear it's the ugliest city in the country. Or maybe that's Cleveland. Look at how close together their houses are. They don't even have backyards like we do. Look at the pools, they don't have fences around them. That's because they have underground wire fences. A current runs through them and it shocks the dogs when they try to cross it. I feel so sorry for so-and-so's son, he comes out here to go to school in Columbus. I don't know why he would want to be here."
Holy fucking shit! Are you seriously judging a city based on (a) your stupid, uninformed opinions based on rumors from other stuck-up Californian ass-hats, and (b) what you see of when you're fucking FLYING OVER IT? Wow, I hope I never have to be tried by a jury with your prejudiced spoon-fed ass on it. Of course Cincinnati isn't going to look like paradise right now, it's the middle of the fucking winter! You wouldn't know anything about that, though, because you think winter is when it drops to 50ยบ and starts to sprinkle, which you call a Winter Storm and talk for years to your friends about "that awful winter storm we had back in '94". Fuck off. Oh, and by the way, the armpit of America is New Jersey, you ignorant fuck. Everyone knows that. And you know what, it's probably a hell of a lot nicer than the desert covered state you call home, where you have to steal half of the Western US's natural water supply. You want to talk about ugly cities? Look in your own backyard, bitch. Let's judge Los Angeles based on your criteria. Riddled with gang warfare, voluptuous bimbos who are dumber than a rotting log, illegal immigrants running rampant. When I fly into LA, all I see is houses on top of houses. Where are the backyards? There aren't any, douchebag. And what's that layer of brown fog? Oh, that's right, it's a thick layer of pollution that's going to cause lung cancer in half the kids that grow up there. And where's the greenery? There isn't any! You gluttonous pigs paved over every last fucking inch of it with concrete so you could further contribute to the incessant traffic and carcenogenic cloud that forever lingers over your god-forsaken city. And what the fuck are you talking about with pools and fences? I looked out the window and I could see fences around all those houses. Maybe you should go see a fucking optometrist, you senile bitch. Do everyone in the Midwestern and Southern states and keep your resource-gobbling ass out. It would be a waste of space and oxygen to support your pathetic life, you smug bitch. You know who I feel sorry for? Me. Because I have to live with the likes of you for another 3.5 months, and maybe more.
wow. that was an excellent rant.
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