Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Ah, nothing like using the title of a blog post to reference a quote by a band director at ND who was before my time and I never met. I fully expect Mal or Ball to make some comment about said quote, though. Maybe even Jism, too!And now, to explain my seemingly nonsensical practice in paraphasing.
I have just taken a highly scientific, extremely accurate political survey to determine just how conservative or liberal I really am. I must say, I was really hoping for something along the lines of "You could be Rush's understudy." Sadly, I got something different.
| Your Political Profile: |
| Overall: 55% Conservative, 45% Liberal |
| Social Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal |
| Personal Responsibility: 50% Conservative, 50% Liberal |
| Fiscal Issues: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal |
| Ethics: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal |
| Defense and Crime: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal |
Look at me! My political views are more bipolar than a pregnant woman on steroids during her period! What can this possibly mean? Should I start my own party? Will the two sides of my political soul continue to fight each other until it rips itself apart? Even worse, will one side win out? And what if it's the liberal side? I think from those results that I can rest assured that as long as money is still part of society, I'm safe from the last possibility.
Sarcasm aside: As with any polls or quiz, you have to step back and question the bias of the author. Obviously, this was written by an extremist -- someone who only paints in black and white. A friend told me it has more conservative undertones. Beats me. All in all, though, it scored me pretty accurately -- moderate right. (I was joking about the Rush stuff)
have you ever heard of an ethical liberal? yeah, i didn't think so.
somehow i got 50/50 on personal responsibility, and i totally don't buy that. i am like totally anti-big gov't and whathave you. so, don't worry too much about being more moderate than moderate right.
and the best ever snavely quote was:
Naw, naw, naw, has that saxaphone back there got the piles or something?
An excellent Snaves quote, indeed. I enjoyed the one where he commented on the trombones' "poopin' the pants" style of marching - "Y'all look like ya got wrenches in yer pockets!"
I think the "Make sure your unit straddles the line" quote was some assistant director that left before my freshman year. Mal, Ball - help me out here. Jim something?
By far the best Snaves quote, in my opinion, was "If you don't know what to do with it, just put it in your pocket" because, what the hell?? I mean, really, MAN, what the HELL!?
'Twas a Mr. Jim Phillips, and although that was an excellent quote, I can't claim it as the best, because the man was drunk 24/7 and honestly he just said a lot of freakin'sweet shit.
"Swing your unit toward me" was another great Jim Phillips quote. Too bad he retired before you could experience all of his majesty. Band practices were short and sweet when run by Phillips...so we could get back to more important things. Like drinking! Of courtse, I didn't drink when I was a freshman, so I went to Trumpet Dinner like any normal person.
Speaking of great quotes...
"That hand jive is looking pretty good! You all must be practicing in the shower."
- Ken Dye
*under breath*
"Hey Dr. Dye, why don't you pull that dick out of your mouth"
- Pookie, unaware that Dye is directly behind him
"I know a green Cavalier I'd like her to ride."
- JShea about Muscles (JShea was a member of the Cavaliers Drum Corps)
Me: "Dr. Dye, what's the name of the town we're coming up on?"
Dye: *slowly forms "o" with mouth* "Ggggoooooooooooolllllllll" *walks away*
Ahh, there's a great Fr. George quote I can't remember. Something about piccolos and death. Anyone? Anyone?
Piccolos, the right to life only goes so far. - Fr. George Wischkerkenszonwq3ruhrgan CSC
I'm pretty sure the hand jive in the shower comment was Snaves but I'm not completely possitive on that one. Another good Snaves one said to Jim Phillips after a streaker blessed our practice:
"Naw, naw, Jim....this reminds me of that time we were at that nudist colony in Florida. All them old people running around all wrinky and neked..."
"Ggggoooooooooooolllllllll" is by far my favorite quote, in any context, of all time. There exist no words in any language to communicate just how weird that exchange was. Weird even for Dye. Wait, there they were.
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