Rashanda is alive!!
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
They found my car!!
Thank you, sweet Baby Jesus, wrapped in your swaddling clothes with your little baby halo. Thank you for bringing back my Rashanda safely! I can only hope that the drug smugglers who tried to force her to carry 60 kilos of hooch into the US didn't treat her too poorly. Rashanda probably turned the low-lifes in when they got to the border, passing a note to the border guard that said "These fuckers are trying to slip one by you, Mack, so you better give 'em a little taste of your night stick. Probably wouldn't hurt to throw in a little mace and some taser action. Sure, in reality they're pretty stupid (trying to get ganja past you and all), but I'm sure you can convince your boss that they were unruly and threatening, and needed the extra punishme-- err, restraint." Wow, apparently Rashanda is one verbose, vindictive vehicle. And I like alliteration.
To put it succintly, US Customs and Border Protection has my car and now I have to convince them to give it back to me. I'm sure the next few days are going to be as fun as the ones that immediately preceded the car getting stolen. We're not out of the water yet, but we can at least see the surface from here. Let's just hope she's still in tip-top shape, or close enough that the insurance will get her back there.
I'm comin' for you, baby!
Author: Goat » Comments:
Positive Wednesday
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
It's been four days since my car was stolen in Mexico, so I've decided that today I will look at the positives. And go.
- Montezuma is finished exacting revenge.
- I don't have to move the Honda for the street sweepers tomorrow
- 4 day weekend!
- Replacement cell phone has arrived and is finally functioning (send me you phone numbers, I lost them all)
- I still have the Mustang. And it's still eff-ing awesome.
- Stanford sucks ass, ensuring a victory for the Irish this weekend.
- Oh-so-delicious Tone Triple Shots will soon be upon us.
- Looking forward to Mothball somehow getting wrecked this weekend.
- Rooster called Mothball's car gay in an email today. That never gets old.
- Rooster's mom is hot (sorry Cahk, that never gets old either)
- Baseball is almost over (Thank Jebus)
- Friday is payday
- Lost is back! (Kate is hot. The sky is blue. All truisms. But not altruisms)
Okay, that's it for now. Stay tuned for more awesome Goat posts.
Wow. Goat posts. That. sounds. really. wrong.
And I'm spent.
Author: Goat » Comments:
I want my Rashanda back
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
This weekend I made the trek down to Mexico with 9 of my good friends for the biennial Rosarito-Ensenada 50-mile bike ride. Spirits were high as we packed up the cars Friday night and stopped at Chipotle for some awesome carb-loading burritos. "Carb-loading burritos?" you say. "Shut up," I say. We spent the night at a lovely Days Inn (which sounds like an oxymoron) in San Diego, where the men's room discussed which male character on Lost is more jacked and which female character we'd most like to bang. We can only assume the women's room hosted a naked pillow fight. We happen to know for a fact that three of them slept in the same bed, a point which prompted a moment of silence during the discussion in the men's room.
After a delicious breakfast at the Pam Pam Restaurant, we were off to Mexico. The ride went great, including the multiple beers consumed during said ride (you can't drink the water, right?). So anywho, we make it Ensenada after about five hours (3:08 on the bikes), get us some celebratory tacos and cervezas, and jump on the shuttle back to the cars.
Only here's the kicker: my car's not there. Rashanda the Honda (a name which I apparently shared with anyone until this weekend) had been stolen! Who would have ever thought, what with the Mexican stereotype being seen as lazy and tired all the time? You'd think they'd be busy with siestas and whatnot. But no, apparently they're wiley little fucks who want nothing more than to steal things from the tourists who come to support their economy.
Okay, calm down. Sorry, but those of you who know me well know that I have no respect for petty thieves. It gets under my skin like almost nothing else in this world. (My apologies on the broad generalism of Mexicans, Lizett - I'm sure your family isn't like that)
So then the fun begins. We wave over a cop and tell him what happened (after fighting through the language barrier). He tells me I have to file a report at the "Administrative Public" and gives me cryptic instructions on how to get there. Of course, the only form of transportation I have is my bike. So I start biking in the general direction he pointed. Half and hour or so later I finally find the place -- four shady miles away.
Once again, I find out that I should have taken Spanish in high school. After a long time (and with the help of some Good Samaritans) I finally get the report filed while my buddy Gilbert has been talking to the Mexican insurance company. Thankfully, I bought a full policy for the day trip.
We originally noticed the car missing around 8:30pm. I finally left Mexico at 3:00am and didn't arrive home until 6:00am. All in all, an awful experience.
Oh, and Monday I came down with Montezuma's Revenge. Fucking Mexico.
Author: Goat » Comments: